Tuesday, May 26, 2015

Here Are A Few Food Shoes

Here are a few whats? Food shoes? Yes, food shoes. There are dangerous shoes and sadistic shoes and ridiculous shoes-- all of which will probably get their own entry-- and food shoes. Shoes that are food or food related. Don't try to eat them, I don't think they'd be too tasty.

This is a subtle example of a food shoe. At first it looks like what every New Yorker looks like on a hot Saturday afternoon coming out of the R train on 9th Street.



 But if you look closely you will see that this is a high heeled sneaker with a food heel. A nasty-assed food heel, but a food heel nonetheless.


Some food shoes look exactly like food and you would not be faulted if you originally thought it was a shoe food. Take these slippers, for example:

Even though they look it, they are not shoe shaped bread. On the contrary, they are the opposite. There is a whole line of Bread Slippers made to look like different kinds of bread loaves. They all look like they'd keep your tootsies toasty. Think twice before buying them if someone in your household likes to drink or smoke a lot and are prone to the munchies.


What's a foot long and slippery? These bad boys!




 Be honest ladies-- and you guys too, let's not be exclusionary-- you'd wear these if you didn't have bunions and plantar fascitis





But since you can't were those because of prolapsed metatarsal and your heel spur, you can wear these instead:




All this walking around in food shoes is making me thirsty. I think I need a nice cocktail

To be honest, I hate the white on black polka dots. That shoe should be taquila colored.


Up for some desert? Doesn't this look delicious?

Or are you looking for something more healthy? A piece of fruit maybe?


And there you have it. A few food shoes.

***
80's romance girl is wearing Pro Keds long before Pro Keds were cool.

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